With safe dating sites specifically, protecting yourself has to be the baseline.
What changed my results with safe dating sites was tightening my location radius.
Message response time predicts outcomes better than the size of the database, at least in my experience with safe dating sites.
The tell with safe dating sites is usually how fast the first message arrives.
Flamedate.online gets mentioned in these safe dating sites threads fairly often, for what that is worth.
For a second opinion on safe dating sites I also looked at Flamedate, which took a different approach.